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| Random good looking groom from Google |
I am aghast. I am agog. And mostly, I am incensed.
And what has gotten me riled up is the latest "viral" post by a person who preaches inane generic advice akin to those you find behind bookmarks or posters of cute kittens, to the masses and calling it "How To Keep Your Wife Beautiful".
And what has made me even more livid is the seemingly endless support by women, many of whom are highly educated, smart independent women, and people I call my friends, even though it is starkly obvious that the article reeks of patriarchy.
Nuggets of "wisdom" like "give her a reasonable budget, not too much not too little" and "provide for her financially" sounds like out of the 50's, before bras were openly burned and when women gossiped around Tupperware parties while their husband sleeps with their secretaries. How does one have the audacity to determine unilaterally the amount that his wife can spend on her own personal things, and on the other hand claim to love and respect her? The stench of sexism is strong with this one.
Imagine the same advice given to women on how to make their men happy, and the first one is, "give him a reasonable budget, not too much, not too little, for his fishing tackles/Xbox games/beer. You think the boys will be as eager to spread the gospel?
You know what makes a woman (or in any partner, men, women, homosexuals, heterosexuals, bisexuals, you catch my drift) happy and hence, to quote the author "beautiful"? Treat and respect them as equals, not someone whose "free time" is yours to bestow or withhold according to your whims.
Woman are mighty capable of keeping themselves beautiful AND happy without your charity, my dear chauvinistic friends.
Now men on the other hand, are doofus, and completely inept when it comes to grooming and keeping themselves handsome. So here are my tips, no religious scriptures necessary, to keeping your husband/boyfriend,/partner, pretty darn good looking.
1. Sex. Lot's of it. In various lingerie and/or costume. Especially if this is the only cardio exercise that he gets.
2. Food. Preferably meat, fried with side of meat. He ain't gonna open a can of whup-ass on the guy that just wolf-whistled you if he is surviving on 1000 calories a day of fruits and greens.
3. Beer, or if celebrating, single malt whisky, and don't worry about the extra weight he will put on because he will lose the pounds with...
4. Sex, and did I mention, lots of it?
If you find my ideas above ridiculous and outdated and anti-feminist, news flash! so are the suggestions in "How to Keep Your Wife Beautiful". So think twice before you start advocating advice gleaned from the Internet and inflicting it on your innocent friends.
